I'm not over.

You see, I feel trapped inside of me.


I can extend my attention to everything around me for a long while, but eventually, I boomarang right back to my insides.


I can't tell if I'm rare for this happening, or totally typical. I can't believe that it's typical because I don't see other people struggling w it like I do.

Maybe no one sees me struggling w it, though.



I think maybe that's part of the reason I can't settle down w things. Can't just decide on something, do it, and allow it to keep me satisfied for more than five to ten minutes.


That might not be a reason for it though.


I need the key. I need umm.. super-glue. Or ...handcuffs. To, you know, keep me and an idea together without any chance of escape.

I dunno.

I have to do something. Or I'm going to get fired sooner than later, for being a pissy employee.

Then I won't be able to pay for anything. Then I'll be really really screwed.


I need to do something before then. Which, today, feels closer than what would be ideal.